


"If At First You Don't Succeed..."

by RosaClearwater



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Hint of serious stuff, Not that Sirius you lovely goofballs, absolute crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 18:03:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14431137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RosaClearwater/pseuds/RosaClearwater
Summary: Why it was always the damn Department of Mysteries?_._In which Harry just wanted to have lunch with Hermione and... it does not go according to plan.





	"If At First You Don't Succeed..."

**Author's Note:**

> Needed to write some crack. It gets a little serious, but still remains crack-like.
> 
> Prompt: The plane was rapidly losing height. He knew he had only one chance.

The Department of Mysteries had lost its wonder halfway through Harry’s first visit. By the end of said visit, suffice to say he never wanted to go back there **_ever_ ** again.

 

Now, he was just angry.

 

And potentially asphyxiating.

 

Somehow, he’d accidentally wandered into a room where everything seemed to be two-dimensional. It was as though he’d been flattened by walls and smushed into a flat-Harry instead of, you know, his normal self.

 

_Why is this here? Who the hell thought this would be a good idea?_

 

No battle had to be waged here any more.

 

Well, at least, not like _then._

 

He just needed to find Hermione, forgot exactly which office she worked in, proceeded to get lost, almost got cornered by Romilda Vane in the elevator (what she was doing working at the Ministry, Harry didn’t know and didn’t want to know), and wound up in the Department of Mysteries. To add insult to injury, he got it into his foolish skull that there had to be more than one obvious exit (and that he could handle the Department of Mysteries after all of these years)… which led to the current predicament.

 

_Why it was always the damn Department of Mysteries?_

 

But he had to stop with the self-pity, because the room was shifting. Walls shook before beginning to smoothly crumble, flat lines throbbed as they began to shrink, and the exit seemed to be getting smaller by the second.

 

The plane was rapidly losing height. Harry knew he had only one chance.

 

(He also knew that if he got out of here alive, Ron and Hermione would never let him live this down. But, he also knew they would be the type of people to resurrect him and then kill him for being foolish enough to die _here_ of all places).

 

So, it was with his usual Gryffindor strength -- or, his usual sheer dumb luck, as Minerva would say -- that he hurled himself out of the flat plane and into the hallway.

 

“Never again,” Harry rasped, feeling as though he could actually breathe again.

 

_._

 

Hermione, in the midst of research for some new legal campaigns, felt a twinge in her gut.

 

Now, she had many gut feelings (“Ron’s being a prat”, “Don’t touch that -- George has done something to it”, etc.) and many reactions (a groan in regards to Ron, a few steps taken back for George, so on and so forth) but this particular gut feeling was probably the worse:

 

“Harry’s being an absolute idiot right now, isn’t he?”

**Author's Note:**

> Now, I’ve got a question and a shameless plug for you today 
> 
> **Question** : Do you think I should post these new stories to FFN again?
> 
> **Shameless Plug** : I’ve put together a new prompt meme challenge called “Changing the Scenes”. It’s about -- you guessed it! -- putting out prompts and writing up stuff you would have liked to have seen differently in _any_ fandom. 
> 
> Whether that’s requesting a “What if Draco had met Harry in a different setting?” or “Did Hermione ever tell McG that she lied about the troll?”, _anything is fair game ;D_
> 
> So, check it out if you’re interested and feel free to submit a few prompts!


End file.
